Halfway done with one half of two fifths of one twentieth

 

I ran a half marathon last weekend. It was the Cambridge Half Marathon and it was certainly Type 2 fun. It hurt in the moment, but I am very glad I did it. The weather was perfect and the crowd was energetic. When I run for a couple miles, I inevitably find myself breaking down the chunks of space and time into fractions - "I'm 1/5 of the way to the halfway point." or "There is one third to go, which means I need to repeat half of the effort that I have put in so far!"

I know this is a bit silly, the total distance can be represented by one scalar value, such as percent completed. I believe some part of my psyche has trouble pushing myself harder physically with this single scalar representation. What's special about being 13.5% done? Or 64.4% done with a chosen distance? For the first example, that is close to 1/8. I can easily imagine 1/8 in a pie graph even if those two quantities are nearly the same. I think part of my mental model wants to simplify the real number that represents this distance into a integer based value. I think this allows me to enjoy little victories throughout the race and mentally gear myself forward to the next little victory. Each mile marker becomes a tiny celebration.

The same thing happens in my formal studies and in the accumulation of capital. I celebrate the end and state of each semester or project. There is something garnered and something to come. In my search for meaning, this is something that yields higher complex pleasure and enjoyment in my life. Having something to look forward towards is crucial and a key part of desire. Maybe someday when I find it much harder to desire and obtain, I will turn towards a mental model that encourages the reduction of desire. Sattva is not so bad right?

The trees are sticks now and the winter is on the way. I worry about maybe different things for the next few years and the years after that. I want to see more powerful structures plan for the longer term. I want greater stability for longer times to come. This reflects my age is some ways. I am young and building experiences in my career and life. These will hopefully yield greater stability in my future. Although I am just one person and I have a small impact in the greater world, even if I were to accumulate some large degree of influence over others. The world will keep turning, the temperature will rise, calories will be burned.

The stink at the Boston Museum of Science is very long.

Moving Quickly and Trying to Slow Down this Fall Semester

 

I feel like I blinked and September is gone. New challenges in front of me and some assignments completed. I have always enjoyed moving quickly and efficiently through work, obligations, chores, and the like. My calendar is as full as it was when I was my busiest ever. It's a somewhat fragile state of affairs at times, but I am getting this all done for a good cause.

The New England Robotics Conference last weekend was a nice time. Brett and I shared work on our soft robotic fingers fabricated with viscous thread printing. Went to the first college-esc party I have been to in a while. Not sure if that is my scene anymore. Dancing and squats and long runs to keep my health up.

There are plenty of things to stress about, but I can see why I am doing this all. It's very clear and I am quite motivated. Looking forward to Thanksgiving :)

Summer Camp at Akwissasne

 

At Akwissasne, I found a moment of peace and calm. These rustic cabins in upstate NY are found outside this planet of fast cars, jet engines, and cargo ships. Separated by dirt roads, thick woods, and mud - Akwissasne and the surrounding area reminds oneself of the beauty in untouched nature. It made me appreciate modern amenities and reminded me how little I need most of them. I felt a separation from everything else in the world outside this sandy lake and a closer connection to those in front of me. I was unplugged from digital connections and data collection systems and I enjoyed it. Coyote and I made good food, stargazed, and sailed carefree. We slept in and told stories slowly. There was enough time to do everything we wanted to do and not nearly enough time to get sick of the silence. I was able to meet some of her family and listen to their stories. I was reminded of my recent readings on Montaigne about how best to live one's life. This place cherishes life. This place and those like it are so special, so crucial, to learning and respecting the boundaries of one's abilities onto this earth. As long as I live, I hope to have and respect zones of nature for my own mindfulness and that of those who I will pass a torch.

Synchronous Fireflies and Summer Plans

I spent my birthday at the Elkmont campground in Great Smoky Mountains National Park (GSMNP). It's nestled into a beautiful and scenic part of the Appalachian mountains. I was invited along by a new friend from the lab to join them during a firefly viewing. I was very happy to find out that this particular part of the park has a special type of firefly that glows in synchrony with their fellow species. This event happens for only one week or so per year in this particular part of the GSMNP. There is another synchronous glowing firefly species in the Congaree NP in SC as well that many people know about. As I spent my first moments of being greater than 26 years old, I was watching the fireflies slowly match one another's glowing pattern in the dark woods. I was amazed. At first the lighting patterns were sporadic like a blanket of Christmas tree lights. Then, I began to see waves of lights flicker through the woods like the 'wave' in a stadium. We wandered in the sea of little lights and then got back to our campsite. I went deeply to sleep. The next day we hiked Jacob's Creek trail and I felt the cold water of a mountain side river. Some members of our hiking group dove in, but I was hesitant in my hiking gear. I will try next time! 

This internship is soaring by and I am chugging along with progress on my auxetic and electrostatic work. I have learned a lot from spending this time outside of my comfort zone. I always spent my undergraduate summers in or near Cambridge, MA. I have learned a lot from putting myself in an environment without all my little creature comforts. I had to pack my car with all the little priceless things I would need for the summer and I have gotten a Costco membership for the things I didn't bring with me.

I will be going to Boston for July 4th weekend and then Coyote will be coming with me to TN for a week plus a few days. I am looking forward to exploring some of the area with her. Later at the end of July, we'll spend time at her family's cabin in the Adirondacks. In August, I have plans to attend the SFF conference as well as a labor day weekend trip on the Cape. 

Life is good and things meld on by.

In Tennessee Now

 

On Sunday, I drove down to Tennessee from Lansing, MI. I drove to Oak Ridge, TN, through the fields of Ohio and the hills of Kentucky. I passed over I-75 gently in the slow lane. I leaned back in my seat and watched the terrain change around me. I thought about the podcasts playing on my stereo system and my thoughts drifted back and forth like the traffic in which I participated. When I entered TN, the highway rose to a ridgeline and I caught a glimpse of mountains and valleys.

I will be here for just over three months to facilitate an internship on auxetic structure fabrication. This is pertinent to my graduate studies. Auxetic materials are special because they have a negative poisson's ratio. That will occupy my mind during the work days to come. Outside of working hours, I will explore the beautiful and storied Great Smoky Mountains. When time allows, I will do a bit of traveling and enjoy the breadth of the region.

Last Saturday, before I started this trip, I attended a wedding. My old friend Eric married his partner and it was a nice ceremony. The weather was perfect. People smiled, cheered, drank, and danced the night away. I had a good time in MI with family. I wish I could stay long enough to clean up all the little messes and fix all the slightly ajar things, but life and career get in the way. so it goes

Halfway to Master

 

I'm back in Geneva, Switzerland, on a wonderful trip to visit Coyote. Last Friday, we went out on the town and later this week we plan to see a whole lot more of the city. Yesterday, we walked through the botanical gardens near her institute and smelled the fresh blooms on the flowers. The city is far more lively and upbeat now than when I visited in January. Back then, I was so nervous for so many reasons but now this trip is immediately comforting.

A few days ago, I was finishing up my second semester and parting goodbye temporarily with my colleagues at Physical Sciences Inc. Those terrifically busy days are shortly behind me now. And while I am here, I can focus on helping Antonia and practicing self care. I will admit that I was a bit overwhelmed with the multitude of things that I was obliged to accomplish prior to this trip. Despite the list of tasks, I was able to properly finish all these obligations to my own satisfaction. We'll see how those things have fared in time...

With a second semester of graduate school behind me, I am officially halfway to a Master's degree in Mechanical Engineering and approximately 1/5th of the way to the doctorate. While most of the truly difficult components of my doctoral program are still far in front of me, such as qualifying exams and paper presentations, I feel capable to have made it this far without a serious issue. It was disappointing to be unselected for my fellowship applications, but I know it will not decide my fate nor long term plans for my career and goals. 

I have this moment now to reflect and prepare. To heal a bit before I find a new challenge at Oak Ridge National Laboratory this summer. I look forward to the new experiences and opportunities to learn on my way.

Leap Year Benefits

 

People don't talk enough about leap day. It's a completely different experience than most days. Because of that added day, sunsets and sunrises on average in the month of February and March are thrown off by up to a minute! All those romantic moments staring off into the sunset and early mornings waking with the sunrise are displaced temporally. Many times now, computer scientists working on important systems for scheduling and planning have missed leap days, leading to potentially ruinous circumstances.

I will not waste my leap day this year. I plan to take full advantage of it and I will ensure my total utility this year equals at least (if not more than) 366/365 of that in a standard, non-leap, year.

I am on track. 

I have been running along the Charles river and eating well. No new cavities at the last dentist visit. I am spending time with friends and I have a few more ski trips left before the winter ends fully. I am looking forward to a warm summer in Tennessee and focus in all things of my life.

Things are pretty good to be honest. And it takes work, it's work I am doing my best on.